Dear Depression

Dear Depression,

Good morning, oh you’re not up yet? I’ll come back later then.

 

 

 

Ok, I can’t wait for you anymore. You know, out there, life is going on. Look. Just untangle your gangly limbs from the stale bedsheets and glimpse out that grotty window. See that? There’s a light out there depression. Stop closing the drapes on me. I want that light. And you won’t let me out.

Where’s the key? I want out. The walls are too close in here, and that ceiling’s too low. Your making me claustrophobic. I want out.

I’m sick of you never wanting to get up. And have you seen the sink? The dishes need washing. The clothes need hanging up. Food needs cooking. Things need to be done! But you wallow here in your squalor whining about how life is too difficult for you.

Suit up. Wash that strawy, oily, knotted up hair, think about the idea if shaving, and open a god damn window. You’ve been hiding under those blankets for too long.

You know what the worst thing is? I’m better than this. You’re like dragging around a twenty pound weight on my chest and a fire cracker in my brain.

It’s time now. Please. I need to find happy again. You chased him away. I know you fight with him all the time, but you’re not good for me. You’re the ice cream in my freezer, the pizza boxes in my recycling, the cigarettes in my pocket. You’re ever-present and ever-annoying. I don’t want you anymore.

I don’t know how to get rid of you. You’re like a virus my body can’t fix. Your the anti-healthy the anti-happy and the anti-me.

 

Leave, now, and please, never come back.

 

Don’t shudder and crawl down in your cosy little hole. That’s pathetic. Stop being so pathetic and childish and look at how you’re affecting the friends, the family and me. You’re a useless rotten piece of junk.

Tell me. Tell me what to do to get rid of you and I’ll do it.

I.

Am.

 

So.

 

 

Done.

 

 

 

I’ll do whatever it takes…..

 

 

Whatever.

 

Forever yours,
At least for the moment.
x

This post is in response to Daily Prompt’s Challenge which, if you’re interested you can read here! I suggest following them, becasue they give GREAT ideas to blog on. Till next time,
x

Failure

Today’s Random Obsession is: Failure

Failure is the state or condition of not meeting a desirable or intended objective, and may be viewed as the opposite of success.

Pretty much, in short ‘Failure’ is screwing up.  I can say it more, or less, colourfully, but either which way it will normally be seen in the most negative of views. Because it has negative connotations I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how it is viewed. Do people enjoy Failure? is that something they want or need in their life? Is failure, however helpful of detrimental you see it, useful to the growth of a person’s character?

“Life is full of Screw-ups. You’re supposed to fail sometimes. It’s a required part of the human existence” – Sarah Dessen, ‘Along for the Ride’

How true is what Dessen is saying? If someone goes through life and fails at nothing are they worse off or better off than someone who goes through life, only failing. I realise this is a pretty extreme case. I cannot think of a single person who has either never failed or only failed in every aspect of their life. But say, in this wonderful world we call the hypothetical, it happened. Say you meet two people, one the Succeeder, who has never experience a single failure in their entire life, and the other the Failure, who has only ever tasted the bitterness so many of us associate with failures. What would they be like? What would they do, who would the be?

Today’s Random Obsession Post: I Am Addicted To Failure..

My twenty-two cents:

I hate failure. I am terrified of failure. Oh dear god no, do not ask me to colour in between the lines, what if i **** it up?! Ok so my fear of failure perhaps isn’t as obvious as that. Nor does it have that kind of massive affect on everyday life. You’d be surprised how often I’m asked to colour in the lines. Unless you say not often. And then you wouldn’t be surprised, you’d be correct. Regardless. Failure is a terrifying aspect of trying. I love saying I’d give anything a go. I’m the girl at the sushi  train with the plethora of plates with foods I cant pronounce let alone spell, and I’ll have tried everything on the menu. I can’t see how you fail at that, you don’t like something its not your fault. I’ll try and do out-there things because in those situations people expect failure. Can you scale a 6 story building with a blindfold and your hands tied behind your back? No? Neither can I. I think my fear comes from expectation of success. I expect to succeed at something and then when I fail I am gutted. And with my pride somewhat substantially deflated I turn my head and cower and ask myself, why you babbling fool, did you fail? How could you be so useless? and other mean things that you seem to think are ok to ask yourself, though you would never utter to another human being in fear of them actually having a 7 foot boyfriend to ‘pummel yo’ ass’. It happens. I don’t know. I think I could go on forever about how I will do everything in my power not to fail. Including not even try. But that holds its own kind of Failure, which is described brilliantly in the attached Random Obsession Post. Till next time my fleeting feelings overcome me with the need to let the internet know how I’m feeling…

Participation award: What is your biggest failure? did it make you a better person?

Forever yours,

Or at least for the moment. 

x